Name It and Claim It

It didn’t take very long for someone to come up with a name for new legislation in the wake of Casey Anthony’s acquittal on murder charges: Caylee’s Law, which would make it a felony for a parent to fail to report a child missing (as if this happens all the time). It’s not the law I have the biggest problem with – it’s the fact that they have to name these things after adorable-child crime victims to get our attention. We have Megan’s Law, Jessica’s Law – even Buster’s Law (that’s animal cruelty legislation named after a dog). But in my case, tugging at my heartstrings doesn’t work – it actually has the opposite effect. I’m perfectly happy with AB 2531 or something dry like that, if it’s a good law. Leave my heartstrings alone! But I guess if a name is needed to raise awareness, I should shut up.

You may have heard my theory before, but just to repeat: if Disney had named the insect character Jiminy Cockroach instead of Jiminy Cricket, guess which bugs we’d be kind to and which we’d be stepping on. Most of us really are suckers.

Fortunately, it doesn’t always work. Here where I live, there was a huge eucalyptus tree whose roots were creating a “speed bump” in the street in front of a branch library, nearly causing numerous traffic accidents. The city announced this tree would have to be removed because of the road hazard. So what did the tree huggers do? You guessed it – they gave it a name, and soon there was a movement to Save Tom the Tree. But the city was a little more concerned with saving drivers than Tom. The tree was cut down – and the road resurfaced. A small sapling was planted on the sidewalk in the spot that Tom once occupied, and will eventually grow. Interesting, though, that I don’t hear anybody calling it Tom, Jr. Actually, I do call it that, every time we pass it.